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The Process

------>https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=EKdzFbKENq0
I like to watch YouTube videos while I do my treadmill workout to help pass the time and this conversation really spoke to my heart. I have learned so much of what these ladies are talking about, and I loved the analogy of "pick up your mat and walk!"
I, too, am a very hopefully person, always watching and searching for the thing that would bring on the healing I was longing for. I thought that's what I was supposed to do...after all,wouldn't I be a better person, mother, wife, friend and everything else that I could be if I was well? I thought " this is not my best work, I can't give You my best until I am healed, Lord."
But things did not really get better until I learned that God wanted me here, now, in THIS situation, and that what He wanted was for me to do the best I could NOW, with everything I had going on. Because its about your heart. It's about your attitude and your humility and your willingness to just trust in God and His good Plan for you. You have to let go of your ideals and your plans and your map for your life,and just say " You know what? The reason I feel so lost, and can't even find myself on this map I made for my life, is that its the wrong map....I don't know The Plan. I don't know the secret. But the Bible tells me that The Way to salvation and happiness is Jesus, so I'm just going go with that, and do what God does tell me He wants from me, and trust that everything else will fall into place."
And God will bless that. And the feeling I get from knowing that, and from feeling, deep in my heart, that it is well with my soul...it brings tears my eyes...because I would never have chosen this path, and then I would have missed all these amazing things, all this growth, and an abundance of blessings.
But don't think that I just float through life now, never worrying or losing my patience or becoming frustrated.
I am still learning. Still a sinner. Still trying to do it all myself at times. Still questioning.
But, by His grace and Spirit, I always come back to the truth that He is holding me and it is all under control, all going according to Plan, and I can rest. And I am grateful.

"It is good for me that I have been afflicted, that I may learn your statutes." Psalm119:71

"But now, thus says the Lord, who created you,... I have called you by your name; You are Mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, nor shall the flame scorch you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Saviour..." Isaiah 43:1-3

"For you, O God, have tested us; you have refined us as silver is refined. You brought us into the net; you laid affliction our backs. You have caused men to ride over our heads; we went through fire and through water; but you brought us out to rich fulfillment." Psalm 66:10-12

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