A Full Summer

The past three months have been a lot to process. It was a crazy summer, and with the seasons starting to change, I've been feeling very introspective.
Looking back over our summer, there was a lot to deal with emotionally, highs and lows, and I feel like it's time to just take a deep breath and reflect...

(*trigger warning- cancer & loss*)

June- I took my first ever flight alone and went to visit/ help one of my sisters for a few days. They had just a new baby and moved to a house that needed a lot of TLC. I was glad to be able to help with the babies and make meals and help organize her kitchen.
After my visit, my sister and her two kids flew back home with me for a visit here. Her husband flew out a week later. We always love it when they visit.
The day after they left, we went on a camping trip to the ocean for a week. That was really fun; we love the ocean so much and we also went on a little day trip and took a ferry ride and visited an old army fort.
 We also celebrated Father's Day with Brian's family at a park near our house. This was kind of a big deal because Brian's Mom was going through chemo treatments and we weren't sure if she would be able to go, but she was. We had a big fried chicken dinner and the kids played with Grandpa's new cornhole game.

July- The first week of July we celebrated July 4th (very minimally) and then my 31st birthday. Due to my current diet, this was the first time in 16 years that I did not have a ginormous chocolate cake... But we did go to Rocket Donuts so I was happy. :)
The next week, to celebrate ten years of marriage, Brian and I flew to Las Vegas and then drove to Henderson, Nevada to stay at a resort on a Lake Las Vegas for four days. We had a great time just being together in the sunshine and the pool. The first night there, we watched an epic desert thunder and lightning storm for almost two hours; we had a great view over the lake and the whole sky just flashed and lit up the mountains around us. It was amazing and humbling to think of God's great power and design. We went on a day trip to the Valley of Fire which was so gorgeous and HOT. We also had a special, fancy dinner on our anniversary that was so, so good. Oh and we fell in love with El Pollo Loco; a healthy fast food restaurant that we ate at three out of the fours days we were there. I think I'm gonna start a petition to bring El Pollo Loco to Washington state. :)
When we got back from our trip, we found out that Brian's Mom had rather suddenly become much weaker. The last chemo treatment, combined with needing a transfusion due to anemia and some other nutrient levels being off had a big effect on her. We spent a lot of time visiting her and his Dad over the next few weeks. Brian's Aunt came from Arizona to help out.
We spent as many evenings as we could at the ocean, our family's favorite place to be.
I also found out my sister in law and brother are expecting their third baby!

August- Brian visited his parents every day, and the kids and I went often too. We were shocked at every visit how fast his Mom was slipping away; she had been doing so well for a long time and this was such a big change in a short amount of time. Brian's Mom passed away peacefully at home, holding his Dad's hand. We can clearly see God's providential hand in the circumstances of that day.
We had a busy few days to plan and prepare for the funeral. Lots of visiting with family members. After the initial blur of activity, things settled down and we are adjusting to the new normal...it's a very strange feeling. She is dearly missed.
 I want to say that for all the bad jokes and mean things people say about mother in laws, none of that was ever my experience. Brian is the youngest and the only son, and it seems like a lot of times that translates into a difficult relationship for the daughter in law. But my mother in law was never over bearing or gave unwanted advice or made me feel like an inadequate wife for her son, and I deeply appreciate that.
 We were concerned about how to deal with everything with our kids. Sophie is seven and Nathaniel is almost six, and sometimes we just wanted to protect them or at least not scar them for life...
But then I realized, God is not "protecting" them from this, so we don't need to be so worried. We did our best to explain things, and asked if they wanted to come along on visits or attend certain things, they surprised us a many times with how well they handled hard situations. I've been praying that God would just use all this for good, and I do think that even though it's sad that they had to go through such a difficult and sad experience so young, our kids have a deeper understanding of life and death and have matured and grown in empathy. Nathaniel prays often at lunch and he almost always mentions his Grandma. They know, and truly believe, that their Grandma is with Jesus and is happy and safe there. And that they will see her again someday. It's a beautiful thing to see that in your children.
 We spent a lot of time just with our own little family the next couple weeks. We went to the ocean, went to the county fair, went out to dinner. We just needed some time to catch our breath.
 We live the closest to Brian's Dad and we've been trying to visit and support him as much as possible. Missing someone is a good reminder to truly appreciate and enjoy time with your loved ones, and also not to become too attached to the things of this world. This is all temporary and we need to keep God's bigger plan in mind, believing He is working all things together for the good of His children.

September- So far this month, I have started a short course at the local college on homeschooling. Since we are planning to continuing homeschooling our children, at least one of us needed to be certified. Brian was able to able go to one class with me, which was fun. I'm learning a lot, not just about school and laws, but about myself and how to be a better parent, and how to encourage my kids to be the best they can be.
 We also got to spend some time visiting with one of my faraway sister and bro-in-laws, who drove out here for a little vacation time. I wish I had at least one of my married siblings living nearby...I treasure their friendships so much now that we are all grown up.
 I have been feeling lonely sometimes lately...just kind of isolated. I suspect not having Brian's mom here has made it even more difficult, but the truth is, I do not have much family nearby (the closest is an hour away). Even though I come from a large family, not being able to just stop in and visit my sisters or have someone close by to watch my kids sometimes is a hard thing sometimes.
 I do like and need alone time, and I don't always feel like being with people even if I have an opportunity, but there are times when a friend living down the road would be awfully nice. Maybe someday. Brian is truly my best friend and I am so thankful to have such a caring and understanding man to call mine.
  Also, I have noticed some good progress in my health issues. Still working on it all, but I can see positive changes, which is encouraging.

So...that's what we have been going through this summer. We are still adjusting to our new situation, but we are ok. We are more than ok actually. We know that God is holding us and we belong to Him and that His plan is the best and that He never makes mistakes.

"Remember Your word to Your servant, for You have given me hope. My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life."
Psalm 119 :49-50

"Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless His holy name. Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits- Who forgives all your sins, and heals all your diseases, Who redeems your life from destruction, Who crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies, Who satisfies your desires with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's."
Psalm 103: 1-5